___幻想HEART; thirtythousandmiles ☆

(oneshot) 22 reasons why we don't sleep

2011-05-17T23:22:00.003+13:00

Title: 22 Reasons Why We Don't Sleep

Author: Jaelyn Park

Rating: G

Genre: fluff

Pairing(s): Minho/Krystal

Fandom: SHINee/f(x)

Summary: 22 reasons why Minho and Krystal are awake until the early hours of the morning.

A/N: Cut down from 50 reasons why. Reasons from tumblr. A pretty crappy and old fic I had sitting on my USB, it's dusty. And incredibly cheesy and iskdgkdnnotmystyle, but hey. Who said I was a good writer? Excuse any mistakes.

22 Reasons Why We Don't Sleep

We don’t want to.

Minho doesn’t know why Krystal hated going to bed early, despite the fact that her schedule starts at 5 in the morning, and finish at midnight. He insists for her to go to bed but she refuses (again). Must be the time zones or something.

Our bodies are tired but our minds are awake.

Victoria had almost fainted when she opened the door at 2AM to a tall man wearing sunglasses and a dark hoodie pulled over his head with his hands stuffed into his pockets, until he took them off, revealing Minho’s familiar face. She cursed under breath (“Why can’t Khun do this for me, too?”) before stumbling back into her room. 5 minutes later, Krystal is curled up against Minho’s solid chest with his arms around her, talking quietly about little things.

When we sleep, when can we stalk tumblr?

Onew had a “secret” crush on Luna ever since they did Beauty & the Beast together. Minho padded past him on the laptop to get a glass of water; he was looking at the photos on fuckyeahfx, pausing at extensive amounts of time on the pictures of Luna. A picture of Krystal came up, Onew paused and looked back at Minho and said “She’s really pretty, Minho. You’re lucky. But she doesn’t have mind-blowing vocals like Luna.”

We’re tired of dreaming.

[2:32AM: 1 new message]

Krystalk3: are you awake?

Minho-oppa~: no (:

Krystalk3: you’re stupid D:

Minho-oppa~: i love you too. ^^

Krystalk3: i miss you.

Minho-oppa~: i wish you were here with me.

We are insomniacs.

“I think we’re insane.”

“We did you figure? What normal person stays up until 3AM when they’ve got things to do at 5?”

Krystal laughs her musical laugh, which sounds distorted over the phone, but still manages to put a smile on Minho’s face.

We’re waiting on an apology that won’t come.

Krystal sat cross-legged on her bed, facing the wall. "Be reasonable," he said from the door. She ignored Minho and continued staring at the blank, white wall. Maybe when she had free time, she'd decorate it. "You can be so immature," he muttered before she heard the creak of the floorboard, telling her that he was gone.

We don’t want our thoughts to turn into dreams to turns into our nightmares.

It wasn’t the first time that Krystal saw Minho flirting with other girls, but when he saw him with his arm around Yuri-unnie’s shoulder – it hit her like a train. What would happen if he dumped her for their prettier, sexier sunbae? She told Luna about this, and Luna just shook her head.

“Get a grip, Soojung-ah. I’ve never seen anyone look at you the way Minho does…and it’s damn creepy.”

‘Cause we ain’t dead yet.

Minho answers the door at 1AM, rubbing his eyes from sleep. In front of him was Krystal, bundled up in a big coat and scarf, grinning up at him. It was snowing lightly outside.

“Krystal…what are you doing?”

Her grin gets even bigger and she chucks her scarf in his face, “The night is young, Minho, and so are we.” She grabs his hand and pulls him outside before he even puts his shoes on.

We’re afraid we might miss out on something that will change our life.

She still remembers staying up until 4am with Jessica, watching F.I.N.K.L on some random korean channel they had installed on their television. Jessica pointed at one of the girls onscreen and said, “One day, I'll be on TV and I will be famous and I'll will have fans sending me presents.” The week after, Jessica had convinced their parents to audition for SM.

We’re waiting for someone to talk to us first.

Krystal sat at the dinner table in their dorm, chin rested upon folded arms, eyes narrowed at the lone cellphone placed in front of her. Ring, dammit, ring.

We watch scary movies at night.

“Oppaaaaa~” Krystal whined, clinging on to Minho’s arm.

“C’mon Krystal, it’s not that scary!”

The screen went dark, and it was eerily silent. Suddenly, a ghastly deteriorated head appeared on the screen. Minho yelped.

Because of Xbox 360.

“I don't know why you always insist for a rematch, we all know who's going to win.”

“Ha ha ha, I let you win on purpose because I pity you.”

Cool people live in a totally different time zone; we stay up to catch them.

When f(x) left for Africa for their photoshoot, Minho was like the walking dead in the morning, compared to his usual lively let's-go-for-a-run self. “Why?” their manager-hyung asked. “Krystal-ssi,” they replied and then everything made sense.

We’re star gazing.

“You know, there’s one new star out here tonight.”

“Really now?”

“Of course. It shines brighter than the rest.”

“And what’s the name of the fabulous star?”

“Krystal Jung.”

We have no bed.

When f(x) first moved into their dorm, it was completely empty. The girls decided that they could either sleep on the floor or not sleep at all. Krystal, being Krystal, stayed up all night talking to Amber about how much fun their debut would be. Turns out the SHINee oppas had the same problem with no beds…

We’re on the phone.

He leaned against the door of the bathroom, his phone pressed to his ear.

“Soojungie, I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to talk in the bathroom in the middle of the night…it echoes.”

She giggles, and Minho can imagine her just waving it off with her hand.

“Yeah, but exactly what can they do about it?”
”Kibum would stop feeding me.”

“That’s why I’m your girlfriend, Minho-ah.”

We’re scared our dreams will be so much better than reality.

Minho awoke, gasping for air. Sweat made his hair stick to his forehead and his shirt clung to his torso. His head was dizzy from the dream of Krystal. She was all over him, doing sensual things to his mind and body. Minho shook his head, as if to get rid of the dirty (dirty, dirty) thoughts but failing. It was time for a cold shower.

Because no matter ho hard we try, our minds find somewhere else to be.

[3:54AM: 1 New Message]

Minho-oppa~: thinking of you.

Krystal<3: i know.

There is not enough time in the world to sleep.

“What is this?” protested Victoria, slapping down the piece of paper which manager-oppa gave to them onto the kitchen table.

“I’m sorry,” the man replied, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s required for you to attend everything.”

Krystal slid the paper towards her, with Sulli reading over her shoulder. A full schedule.

“It’s ridiculous,” murmured Sulli. “The times even overlap each other.”

Tomorrow’s looking worse than today.

Krystal paced restlessly around the dorm, trying to decide whether or not to call Minho. She sighed. She really should sleep soon; manager-oppa said something about having a full schedule, from 4AM to midnight or something. Krystal stood in the kitchen and pursed her lips, clutching onto her phone. If he wanted to talk to her, he’d call her first, she decided.

We drink Mountain Dew in excess.

“You’re amazing, Krystal.”

“I know I am, oppaaaaa~”

She truly was. Minho had never seen anyone get tipsy on Mountain Dew before. Maybe Krystal had low tolerance with fizzy drinks.

We can have time alone when everyone is asleep.

After the longest day ever possible, Krystal flopped down onto to her bed. For the first time in what seemed eons, she actually felt tired. She closed her eyes, remembering the soft pressure against her lips and Minho’s warm, strong arms around her. Krystal rolled over and smiled into her pillow. Love makes you smile like an idiot.

(blog) take a bite of my heart tonight

2011-04-03T23:51:00.002+13:00

Listening to: Neon Trees - Animal (Glee cover)

HI. I'm back again for a brief update, bring you a list of stories in the works. Knowing me, they probably won't be up for another long extended period of time...[insert evil laugh]. No, but seriously, I'm very lazy and have been losing inspiration and motivation to write. And I also change fandoms like, every week. Just sayin'.

This is the list of the unfinished works of Jaelyn Park as of the 3rd of April, 2011, in no particular order:

(Format: Title: Chapter (Year) - Pairing (Fandom))

The 5 Stages of Heartbreak: Stage 5 - Recovery (2009-2010) - Key/Onew (Kpop)
I Hate That I Love You: Chapter 10 (2009) - OC/OC
Flying High (2011) - Draco/Hermione (Harry Potter)
Fourteen (2011) - Arthur/Ariadne (Inception)
Krystal & The Giant: Spin-off from Yoong & The Giant (2010) - Krystal/Minho (Kpop)
Reminiscence (2010) - Jonghyun/Jihyun (Kpop)
Plain Rude (2011) - Wes/Santana (Glee)
Why We Don't Sleep (2010) - Krystal/Minho (Kpop)
Doubting the Dark: Chapter 5 (2011) - Draco/OC (Harry Potter)
~~Cityrail Sucks~~ Crosswords (2011) - Jeff/Quinn (Glee) ~~Alternate title to be decided.~~

WOW, THAT'S A LOT. O__O

(blog) i am in misery

2011-03-23T23:12:00.001+13:00

Listening to: Maroon 5 - Misery

Happy 101st post!

The skin of my forearm has never looked more vulnerable.

(blog) why is everybody so obessed? money can't buy you happiness

2011-03-09T20:06:00.000+13:00

Listening to: Jessie J - Price Tag

So I had these ideas for one-shots, and now I have to decide which fandom to use, since using my original characters requires too much effort. One idea is definitely an angst one, and it could either end really badly or really happily. The other one is more fluffy and a typical fanfiction.

I was thinking Arthur and Ariadne from Inception (Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Ellen Page), and/or some random k-pop pairing, like Changmin (TVXQ!) and Yoona (SNSD) or Wooyoung (2PM) and IU.

I actually considered Gossip Girl pairings before realizing, "Nah, Blair Waldorf would not approve of my tacky ideas."

But other than that, I currently have writer's block on Doubting the Dark and my other secret project, which I haven't touched since.. last year.
Honestly, I don't feel like writing anymore. It doesn't make me feel accomplished as it used to. More like...degrading.

(blog) open up your dreams, and damn, you're free

2011-02-15T20:02:00.001+13:00

Listening to: Jason Mraz - I'm Yours

Helloooooooo. I'm back, just to update on a list of links relating to this blog in some sort of way.
The list is located directly under the WELCOME; section.

Don't forget to check out my new HP story, Doubting the Dark!

kthxbai.

(fiction) doubting the dark: chapter four

2011-02-15T19:54:00.000+13:00

Title: Doubting the Dark
Rating: PG13
Genre: Romance + adventure + humour
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing(s): Draco Malfoy/OC + Ron Weasley/Hermione Granger + Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Summary: A new transfer student from Beauxbatons, Valerie, comes to Hogwarts. She's there for barely 4 weeks before Dumbledore drops a bomb: there will be a House Cup Tournament -- a mini version of the Tri-Wizard Cup. Before too long, she finds herself tangled up with Quidditch, the Golden Trio, a Duelling Club and Draco Malfoy himself. The time will come when Valerie will have to choose between light and dark.
Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. LOLjk. I do not own anything to do with the Harry Potter world, except for the Blackwater's and the plot line.

("My devilishly handsome good looks?" "Don't make me laugh.")

(fiction) doubting the dark: chapter two + three

2011-01-29T23:56:00.000+13:00

Title: Doubting the Dark
Rating: PG13
Genre: Romance + adventure + humour
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing(s): Draco Malfoy/OC + Ron Weasley/Hermione Granger + Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Summary: A new transfer student from Beauxbatons, Valerie, comes to Hogwarts. She's there for barely 4 weeks before Dumbledore drops a bomb: there will be a House Cup Tournament -- a mini version of the Tri-Wizard Cup. Before too long, she finds herself tangled up with Quidditch, the Golden Trio, a Duelling Club and Draco Malfoy himself. The time will come when Valerie will have to choose between light and dark.
Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. LOLjk. I do not own anything to do with the Harry Potter world, except for the Blackwater's and the plot line.

Chapter Two: ("Parkinson, it looks like someone took a shit on your face," said Malfoy.)

Chapter Three: ("Because Draco Malfoy always gets what he wants, doesn't he?" she whispered.)

(blog) you make me wanna cry

2011-01-29T23:46:00.001+13:00

Listening to: MBLAQ - Cry

I am a selfish bitch.
Ice runs though my veins.
But I try, you know?
Although, I can't help but feel hatred because when I found something that I liked, something I was finally half-decent at, they took it away from me and did it better.
I should be happy. Shouldn't I?
When they talk to me, sometimes I want to yell shut up, I don't care, but I don't, because they're the only people who talk to me on a regular basis anymore.
I don't have anything uniquely my own because someone will see it, and then do it better. That is life. But I am insensitive as I am sensitive and I'm cruel to those around me accidentally because I cannot control myself.
I am conceited, self-centered, attention seeker, weird, selfish, pessimistic, biased and cold.
Something is wrong with me.
Everyone else has left me alone, and I don't blame them. It's lonely now. It's karma, all the mistakes of my past have come back.
I am a selfish bitch.
And it can't be fixed.
What went wrong?

Help me.

(fiction) doubting the dark: chapter one

2011-01-03T15:44:00.000+13:00

Title: Doubting the Dark - Chapter One
Rating: PG13
Genre: Romance + adventure + humour
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing(s): Draco Malfoy/OC + Ron Weasley/Hermione Granger + Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Summary: A new transfer student from Beauxbatons, Valerie, comes to Hogwarts. She's there for barely 4 weeks before Dumbledore drops a bomb: there will be a House Cup Tournament -- a mini version of the Tri-Wizard Cup. Before too long, she finds herself tangled up with Quidditch, the Golden Trio, a Duelling Club and Draco Malfoy himself. The time will come when Valerie will have to choose between light and dark.
Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. LOLjk. I do not own anything to do with the Harry Potter world, except for the Blackwater's and the plot line.

(She held her head high, the pride and graciousness of a Beauxbatons student.)

(fiction) doubting the dark: prologue

2010-12-30T23:16:00.001+13:00

Title: Doubting the Dark
Rating: PG13
Genre: Romance + adventure + humour
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing(s): Draco Malfoy/OC + Ron Weasley/Hermione Granger + Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Summary: A new transfer student from Beauxbatons, Valerie, comes to Hogwarts. She's there for barely 4 weeks before Dumbledore drops a bomb: there will be a House Cup Tournament -- a mini version of the Tri-Wizard Cup. Before too long, she finds herself tangled up with Quidditch, the Golden Trio, a Duelling Club and Draco Malfoy himself. The time will come when Valerie will have to choose between light and dark.
Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. LOLjk. I do not own anything to do with the Harry Potter world, except for the Blackwater's and the plot line.

("Shut up, you stupid woman," Voldemort spat in her direction. "Silencio! Crucio!")

(list) OTPs

2010-10-24T00:39:00.000+13:00

Oh, lists. It has been a while since I have made one. Now this one, is on my favorite pairings -- to write about, or to read about. In no particular order...

All images belong to their respective owners.

Chuck Bass & Blair Waldorf (Ed Westwick & Leighton Meester)

Gossip Girl

Se7en & Park Hanbyul (Real couple <3)

Jace Herondale & Clary Morgenstern (Fan cast: Alex Pettyfer & Molly Quinn)

Mortal Instruments

Choi Minho & Krystal Jung (Fan Pairing)

SHINee & f(x)

Lee Donghae & Im Yoona (Fan Pairing)

Super Junior & Girls' Generation

Kim Jaejoong & Kwon Boa (Fan Pairing)

DBSK & BoA

Nickhun & Victoria Song (We Got Married)

2PM & f(x)

Ok Taecyeon & Im Yoona (again) (Cabi Pairing)

2PM & Girls' Generation

Kangin & Kim Taeyeon (Fan Pairing)

Super Junior & Girls' Generation

Kim Jonghyun & Jessica Jung (Fan Pairing)

SHINee & Girls' Generation

(blog) breathe in breathe out

2010-10-23T23:42:00.001+13:00

Listening to: B2ST - Soom

First of all, I'd like to apologize for not updating anything in ages. I bet no one even looks here anymore. -cries in a corner- But, to make matters more difficult, this is a rant-blog post. I apologize beforehand if I offend anyone in the process of my ranting.

-breathes in & out, oh, the irony-

It has come to mind that people these days are getting shallow. I am not saying that I am not shallow, myself, because I am... in ways. But some people are just so blatantly shallow that I want to punch them in the face. These people either refuse or simply cannot look beyond what they can see. Sometimes, when the problem at hand is in front of their face, they are too caught up in themselves. I thank the heavens for all the optimistic people on Earth, I mean, what could we do without their sunshineyness, but they say their lives are good and they ask everyone around them 'Hey, my life is fine. How come yours is so fucked up? You're too young to be crying over boys and what not.' Yeah well, you know what? SHUT UP. People like that don't know anything. The problem isn't always boys, you know? That's almost an insulting assumption. They think the sad people are shallow and boy obsessed, when really, they're the shallow ones. They're oblivious to what's beneath the surface. For all they know, the person at hand could be having family issues or depression and anxiety or paranoia, self esteem problems, health problems or friend problems. The list is endless. They wonder why they're so gloomy all the time, and why they keep to themselves, by themselves?
Because these people just wouldn't understand.
Because to these people, everything is the same, everything is neutral, everything is indifferent. Life is good, to these people, they don't think these things will change, they don't suffer. Everything changes. It's only a matter of time before they do.

(oneshot) nothing to say [i'm going crazy]

2010-10-01T00:43:00.004+13:00

Title: Nothing To Say (I'm Going Crazy)

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: PG

Genre: Angst + Drama

Paring(s): Undefined. (Perferably Junhyung/Jihyun)

Fandom: Kpop in general. (B2ST/4minute)
Summary: Their relationship faltered to the point where there was nothing left to say.

A/N: 97% of plot based of Se7en's I'm Going Crazy MV featuring his girlfriend, Park Hanbyul. You can use your imagination, since I didn't use any names, but it seems that Junhyun of B2ST would fit the male role, yeah?

Nothing To Say (I'm Going Crazy)

I really have no clue.

I can’t take this anymore.

This is really driving me crazy.

☆★☆

She didn’t know that he had gotten off his schedule early. They hadn’t spoken to each other since she left him with the car, and for her, it was excruciating. But he probably felt nothing. She trudged down the hallway to their apartment to grab some clothes but a cold voice stopped her halfway.

Hey, what are you doing here?

She turned around, to see his familiar face, shadowed by the dark circles under his eyes. He watched her carefully with wary eyes.

I live here too, you know.

Huh. Don’t know how long that will last for.

She narrowed her eyes.

What are you trying to say?

Does it matter anymore? It’s not like you still have a right around here since you pulled that stunt with the car.

You have no one but yourself to blame for that.

What did I do that was so wrong?

She threw her hands up into the air, as if to say ‘oh my fucking god’.

I thought you were a bit slow before, but now I know that you’re mentally challenged.

He stepped around her, so that he was blocking her way into the apartment.

Don’t talk to me like that.

She closed her eyes and sighed, before pushing her way past him.

☆★☆

She sat in the safety of her van, away from all the screaming fans and pulled out her cell phone. She hit ‘one’ on her speed dial and after two rings, he picked up.

“Hello?”

She smiled at his voice.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m talking at the moment. I’ll call you back later.”

“When do you finish? Do you want to watch a movie?”

“I’ll see. Bye.”

He hung up abruptly, and the dial tone echoed in her ear.

“Hello?”

She huffed and threw her phone back into her bag in frustration. She leaned back in her seat and sighed. She didn’t blame him for being busy; he was an idol – one of

Korea

’s top stars. And he was hers, all hers.

☆★☆

Bursting into the apartment, she went into the first room she saw – the bedroom. She could hear his heavy footsteps following her and a stream of quiet, but audible swearing. She took a pillow off the bed and stood in front of him.

What…are you doing?

She smacked him as hard as she could with the pillow, although she knew that a pillow wouldn’t hurt him but the pillow ripped and soft down cascaded around them. He snatched the pillow away from her, and threw it against the wall, more feathers exploding out of it.

What’s gotten into you?

She stared at him incredulously.

☆★☆

She stood on the stairwell, waiting for him to show up. She rushed straight after her schedule was finished to meet him but she was the one who ended up waiting. Half an hour later, the sky got darker by the minute and a familiar face approached her.

“Why did you get here only now?”

She folded her arms across her chest and waited (she was always waiting for him) to answer.

“My schedule only finished just now.”

“It’s been 30 minutes already.”

“Work just finished now, so what do you want?”

She winced. He had been snapping at her more and more these days.

“You should have at least messaged me during work.”

“I forgot.”

“You forgot?”

He looked away, not guiltily, but as if he wanted to turn invisible.

“You promised to meet me, is that not something worthy enough for you to bother keeping?”

He dug his hands into his pockets and didn’t meet her eyes once.

☆★☆

She stormed into the studio, where she painted and sculpted as a hobby. She went over to the table and pushed off all the paints and brushes and paper.

What the hell are you doing?

His yell didn’t stop her and as continued to destroy her own work. It meant nothing to her now since she drew it under the haze of love. A loud cracking sound made her pause. He had thrown a stool at the porcelain sculpture that sat against the far wall of the studio. She scowled. So two could play at this game.

He walked out and huffed and sat down on one of the two stools at the mini bar, in the living room. He expected her to sit down as well (to talk like ‘civilised people’, but instead, she grabbed onto the wooden seat and threw it at the shelves of liquor. The bottles fell and smashed, their content making a massive puddle on the floor. He stood up and slammed the palms of his hands against the bar, catching her attention.

Will you just…calm the fuck down?

No, I will not ‘calm the fuck down’. Don’t tell me what to do.

☆★☆

He sat across from her, stuffing his face with cake like he didn’t acknowledge her presence. He probably didn’t. It hurt.

“Don’t you have anything to say? You’re not saying anything and just eating.”

The silence hurt. He took another bite, and still didn’t look at her.

“Talk. I’m listening.”

“I’m asking, don’t you have anything to say?”

“Huh?”

He looked up at her with a blank expression, chewing.

“Whatever. Just eat.”

She bit back the tears and the urge to slap him. What was happening to them? What did she do to make the obvious crack in their relationship?

☆★☆

She sat down of one of the leather chairs and sifted through the magazine that lay on the coffee table in front of her. He sat across from her watching her warily.

Why are you being like this?

Her head snapped up.

Why am I being like this?

She felt the newly diminished sparks flare up inside her again. But she laughed – a cold, humorless laugh, it echoed in the almost empty apartment. She tucked up her knees under her chin.

You should look at yourself, and then look at us…and you’re asking me why I’m being like this.

While flicking through the pages, she came across a full page picture of him. She smiled sadly. He had always been so good looking. She ripped out the page and set it alight with the lighter she found on the table.

He watched her hold the picture, the flames melting his face, crumpling it into black dust.

☆★☆

They were on their way home, and it started to sprinkle. He opened up an umbrella and held it over them. She smiled to herself. Maybe things weren’t that bad (maybe).

She latched herself on to her boyfriend’s arm but he stopped. She heard him sigh, and he pushed her hands off him and walked ahead. He stopped once to look back at her, to see if she was following him, but she just stood there, staring at him. Was he ashamed to be seen in public with her? It was ironic anyways, since they had been dating since senior high school, but never came out into the open until last year. Maybe he thought that it was bad for his image. Well, his image wasn’t the only one at stake.

☆★☆

Look, I know I haven’t been good to you for the past few days, but I have my reasons.

She looked at him distastefully, and leaned back.

Don’t pull out your busy schedule shit on me, because we both know that you’re not the only famous person here.

Then I don’t know what to say.

She made a disgusted noise. You never have anything to say anymore, so why not just stop with the excuses?

She was standing now and started picking at a bunch of flowers in her hands. He started to pace around the rooms until he stopped and leaned against the wall across from her.

I wouldn’t have to make excuses if you weren’t so moody all the time!

Moody?!

It was like rage had possessed her. The floor around with was sprinkled with the ripped petals. She saw red when she flung the remainder of the flowers at him, which he dodged. The next thing she grabbed was the fishbowl, the water inside tipping dangerously, and she threw at the wall space, just next to his head.

How can you be so selfish? I am not the moody one here, you are. I was the one running around, trying to make you happy; trying to patch up this fragile bond we call a relationship but you just kept ruining it with your moods! In case you haven’t realised already, you mentally challenged bastard, I was the only one putting some sort of effort into us. ‘Us’, does that ring a bell?

He watched the glass shatter onto the floor, and the goldfish that struggled to survive. As it wriggled on the floor, he realised.

You’re right.

☆★☆

She drove over to his practice studio at the head building to pick him up. He wordlessly got into the car and ignored her. Her eyes narrowed at the road ahead of her. He put his headphones in and put his hood up and just sunk further into his seat.

“It’s raining a lot.”

No answer.

“What should we eat? What do you want to eat?”

He closed his eyes. She leaned over and pulled out one of his headphones. His eyes snapped open, and looked at her as if she was his nagging mother.

“I asked you, what do you want to eat?”

“Let’s just have whatever.”

“Why do you always say ‘whatever’? Can’t you be like a guy and say ‘let’s eat this, let’s go there.’?”

“Don’t you know that I’m tired?”

He turned so he wasn’t facing her. He was being a brat (like usual). She wondered why she even liked him in the first place.

“Do you think I’m like this because I don’t know you’re tired?”

“My god, I don’t know. We can just go home if you want.”

She scowled, and let out a short, frustrated breath. Her death grip on the steering wheel made her knuckles go white.

“Are you the only one with schedules? Are you the only one who’s busy? I have schedules too, and I’m busy too! It’s difficult for me too!”

He opened his eyes and looked over at her angrily.

“Why are you being so damn annoying?” he said sharply.

“Annoying?!” she shot back. She wanted to hit him, and she wanted to scream in his face, to tell him to stop being such an ass.

Her breathing became ragged, and she gritted her teeth. Up ahead she saw a large pile of rubbish and old clothes. She jerked the wheel to the right, narrowly missing the wall, and hitting the pile. She turned off the engine and got out of the car. The last thing she needed was to be stuck alone in small space with a man that seemed to have PMS.

He got out as well, and slammed the door.

“Hey! Are you fucking crazy?”

She hesitated before she turned around, a deadset expression on her face. She will not cry in front of him.

“Yeah, I’ve gone crazy.”

☆★☆

You’re right.

The black rage that had consumed her a minute ago suddenly vanished.

What?

You’re right, it’s my fault and I’m sorry. I don’t have an excuse but I have an apology.

He approached her as if to embrace her. The tears that she had held onto for so long started to roll down her cheeks and she sank onto the floor, sobbing quietly.

Don’t…don’t touch me.

He paused, wondering whether or not to listen to her or not.

Will you…give me another chance? I don’t think I could ever forgive myself if I lost you.

He hung his head, and waited. Time was cruel, and it felt like an era had passed before she responded. She stood up, and met his eyes – her blotchy, red and swollen eyes (but still pretty) to his worried, dark brown ones.

I can’t do this anymore. Within this love, we were just going crazy. What I wanted wasn’t much.

(blog) ma ma ma ma madonna donna

2010-08-20T21:59:00.000+13:00

Listening to: SECRET - Madonna

And so, I've decided to make a tumblr. So you can find me on tumblr @ thirtythousandmiles.tumblr.com

I post my fashion sets there, and reblog pretty pictures and such.

PLEASE FOLLOW ME D:

ANd I've misplaced my USB somewhere, in which is everything, and so I hope I can find it soon.

(drabble) by myself

2010-08-17T00:24:00.000+13:00

Title: By Myself
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: G

By Myself
It's a nice day today, a happy day (that's a lie, its anything but). We sit around and all I can do is listen. Just keep on whispering, pretend that I'm not there, and I'll pretend like I can't hear you. It doesn't really matter what it is you're talking about, but the fact that you would keep me out of it hurts the most. Secrets.

Gradually, the whispers turn into vague slurs, they're incoherent, and seem to match the blurry drops that gather in the windows to my soul. Its not like anyone would notice, and if they did, its not like they would care. After they blink, it would all disappear in a second, like an oasis in the middle of the desert. The grey clouds begin to roll in and the rain will fall, but by then, no one will be around to see it.

Sometimes I wonder if other people see things the way I do, if everything is a whole lot darker for them as well. I can see the dark shadows that lurk behind everything. And then I realise that I'm all alone.

(drabble) the truth & its counterparts

2010-08-16T00:35:00.000+13:00

Title: The Truth & Its Counterparts
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: G

The Truth & Its Counterparts
There are many things that come in the package called 'life', some are pleasant and fluffy whereas others are dark and horrid. Truth lingers in the middle, it can also bring either pleasant and fluffy things or dark and horrid things. Accompanied by truth, are lies. Both are treacherous waters that can pull you under and drown you. They can block out all the morals that you once valued and can point you into a totally new direction. Sometimes, they'll take you up high and then send you crashing into the ground.

It starts with a question, a confession, an opinion, a statement. You're unaware if its bullshit or not. You ask for the truth and they lie. It hurts, it burns. But when they reveal the truth, you never thought it would be possible, but maybe it hurts even more. It starts to sink in. You thought that if they told you truthfully, that'd everything would be okay again. But the truth is that it never will be the same again. Everything changes when you realise that it was all lies. You would lie awake at night, staring up at the eiling, wondering why you were such a fool.

Lies are deceiving things, they will play with your mid, weaving in and out of your thoughts. Sometimes the truth hurts, but the truth is the truth, right? You can't say that you never asked for it and you'll wish that you never did.

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright because I like it the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry, but that's alright because I love the way you lie.

(blog) abc meme.

2010-07-31T01:09:00.000+13:00

Taxed off kami_no_kami @ livejournal.com
A - ACCENT: None
B - BREAST SIZE: .____.
C - CHORE YOU HATE: cleaning my room, or cleaning in general.
D - DAD'S NAME: tuan
E - ESSENTIAL MAKE-UP ITEM: eyeliner + concealer
F - FAVORITE PERFUME: uh.
G - GOLD OR SILVER: silverrr
H - HOMETOWN: bankstown
I - INSOMNIA: LOL ?
J - JOB TITLE: student
K - KIDS: psh.
L - LIVING ARRANGEMENTS: i have my own room, thanks :)
M - MUM'S BIRTHPLACE: someplace in vietnam
N - NUMBER OF APPLES YOU'VE EATEN: ..eheh.
O - OVERNIGHT HOSPITAL STAYS: none that i know of
P - PHOBIA: ...
Q - QUEST: many many things. ;D
R - RELIGIOUS AFFILIATION: none
S - SIBLINGS: 1 older brother.
T - TIME YOU WAKE UP: for school; 6.30am, every other day; 11am+
U - UNNATURAL HAIR COLORS YOU'VE WORN: none
V - VEGETABLE YOU REFUSE TO EAT: chilli
W - WORST HABIT: stop being able to sit still
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: chest and head/jaw and arm.
Y - YUMMY FOODS YOU MAKE: cupcakes? :L
Z - ZANY QUIRK: lolwut.

(oneshot) in 5 ways

2010-07-27T00:07:00.001+13:00

Title: In 5 Ways
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: G
Genre: fluff ?
Pairing: American Couple (Jay/Jessica)
Fandom: 2PM/SNSD
Sumary: In 5 ways Jessica hated Jay Park.
A/N: One of the few fics that I wrote down on paper, instead of the others :S It's pretty short. Might write a part 2?

In 5 Ways

[ Jessica ]
o1. I hated how
him and his band would grab every Multizen or music award out there. Even with our hit songs Gee and Tell Me Your Wish, their Again & Again and I Hate You promotions still stole the spotlight from us; apparently chocolate abs beat long legs and honey thighs.

o2. I hated how
he could look so good on stage or off, make up on or not, shirt on or off. When all the crazy fangirls screamed until their jaws dropped off when they saw a flash of abs or some skinship here or fanservice there. They didn't scream as much when we came on stage wearing the shortest shorts ever.

o3. I hated how
he could make all the females in the room melt into a sticky puddle on the floor and he could make all the males in the room have jealousy burn through their veins; all with one wink, or some flirtatious comment, or a quick dance he choreographed the night before. All my members told me to stop looking so icy and to enjoy the moment. I think they turned into stone in their seats after my response.

o4. I hated how
he showed up at my door at one o'clock in the morning, looking like he'd run a marathon in 10 minutes, clutching at a worn looking bouquet of my favorite flowers. Sooyoung answered the door, and with a dirty smirk, I had been dragged out of the safety of my room to the door.

o5. I hated how
he had said "I can make you love me," and was successful.

ANNOUNCEMENT: #86 - TOTAL FML.

2010-07-26T00:31:00.000+13:00

I think I might go and shoot myself.
My USB got water damaged (it went through the wash T______T)
It had all my school work, all my writing -- completed and unfinished works, stories in the making and banners, photos etc.
It's not working at the moment, but the light still turns on when I plug it in. Yes, I have tried switching ports but it still doesn't show up on screen. I can see the water droplets on the inside but ...
I WANT TO FUCKING SHOOT MYSELF.
That is all, see you soon, maybe.

(oneshot) yoong & the giant

2010-07-11T22:05:00.000+13:00

Title: Yoong & The Giant
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: G
Length: ~1200 words
Genre: Fail!crack, and honestly, I don't know.
Summary: Yoona encounters two kind of giants, one the mental kind, the other, the human, sexy kind.

Yoong & The Giant

Yoona sighed as her head throbbed as if her brain was pounding against its skull. At one point, Seohyun asked if she was feeling alright and Yoona just shot her a dark and stony look that Medusa would be proud of. Seohyun turned the slightest shade paler, nodded and mumbled a quick “There’s water on the table if you need it, unnie,” before running off to find Taeyeon. Yoona was cranky – no one ever bothered Yoona when she was cranky, ever.

She sighed again, pressing her fingers against her temples as if the soreness would magically disappear. The girls’ manager burst into the packed waiting room with his arms full of bags, screaming over the loud voices of the stylists and wardrobe people that he had bought some fried chicken to eat after their performance. That probably just made Sooyoung’s day.

Without warning, a stage assistant entered the room with a megaphone in hand, blasting the words “SO NYEO SHI DAE ARE ON IN FIVE MINUTES, I REPEAT: FIVE MINUTES. PLEASE MOVE TO THE BACK STAGE AREA, NOW!”

The last syllable rang in her ears, as the pain in her head intensified. Yoona had no other choice but to shrug it off since the perky stage assistant was prodding her lower back with the megaphone, telling her to get a move on. If it weren’t for Taeyeon’s reassuring hand on her shoulder reminding her that she was minutes away from their performance, Yoona swore she would have snatched the megaphone away and knocked the guy on the head with it.

Yoona wasn’t sure which feeling was stronger: the ache hammering in her head or the nervousness fluttering in her stomach.

“You’ve done this hundreds of times before, Yoona. No need to panic,” said their manager-oppa, slapping her back in encouragement. Irritation burned through Yoona’s veins, but she couldn’t do anything about it since he already moved on to talk to Taeyeon. She huffed in exasperation. More stage assistants flitted around them, fitting the girls with microphones, adding the last touch-ups of make-up and completing sound checks. She closed her eyes and willed for the consistent pain to go away and she almost shot herself when it remained lingering in her skull.

While waiting for the group currently onstage to finish up their song (which happened to be their Super Junior sunbaes), Yoona wondered if staying up late (and usually all night to improve her Japanese) was starting to take its toll on her mental state.

It seemed like years before Sulli, Wooyoung and Taecyeon, the emcees of Inkigayo, introduced them.

In addition to the thumping pain in her cranium, it felt as if her heart was beating in her throat. The screaming and the chanting of the fans grew louder and louder as the girls stepped onto the darkened stage. They took up their positions, Yoona’s heart was beating so hard that she wouldn’t have been surprised if Jessica, who was the nearest to her, could hear it. The colourful stage lights began to sparkle and their song started.

A minute and a half later, the screeching fans, the intense choreography, the flashing lights and intimidating cameras were not helping the excruciating ache in Yoona’s head. It was her part again and as she stumbled slightly. You are a trained professional, Im Yoona, pull it together, she thought to herself.

Honestly, Yoona wasn’t sure what happened next. Did she slip and trip over one of the ground stage lights? Her vision slurred and her hearing went fuzzy. Everything tuned out and it was like all those sleepless nights had decided to crash down on her in that very moment.

The last thing she heard was Taeyeon shouting at someone (probably that stage assistant from before) to get the paramedics. And then the treacherous black waters of her mind had finally swallowed her up.

☆☆☆

Yoona felt something cold and damp on her forehead. Her first thought was “Yuck.”. It felt strange yet soothing. Her head felt light and her mind was blank, as blank the white ceiling that had paint peeling off the edges. Yoona tried to open her eyes but the bright fluorescent light above her made her do other wise. She could hear voices but they were incoherent. The room smelt like disinfectant, it stung the rims of her nose. It was so clean…like a hospital. Then she realised how cramped her lower back felt. Yoona tried to sit up properly but a pair of hands ushered her to lie back down. It was a good thing they did that since a wave of dizziness made her world spin. Yoona groaned.

“Please get this disgusting wet thing off my head,” she said quietly to no one in particular. There was a throaty chuckle before a deep, familiar voice said, “If you don’t keep it on, you won’t get better.”

Yoona looked to her side, and saw Taecyeon, one of the hunkiest guys in 2PM that her and her members always squeal about whenever he decides to flash some abs. A grin quickly took over the scowl on her face.

“Yeah, well, if you had a disgusting wet thing on your face, which by the way feels like a dog is slobbering all over my forehead, you’d also want to get rid of it,” stated Yoona, trying to keep her face serious (and failing) before she let out a stream of giggles.

At that moment, Yoona realised that the pain in her head had disappeared. She almost jumped for joy if it weren’t for the embarrassing gaze from Taecyeon (she felt her cheeks start to turn pink). That and an old, limping man hobbled into the quiet room, closely followed by her fellow members and her manager. She could also see the other 2PM members standing just outside doorway.

“Yoong, this is Dr. Kim Soo-ro,” introduced Taeyeon, gesturing to the man. He looked ecstatic. Yoona pouted slightly, she hated doctors.

“Well Yoona-ssi, I’m happy to say that it’s nothing serious. Seohyun-ssi told me that you had a bad headache before,” he said in a matter-of-fact tone and Seohyun gave her an unnie-I-was-so-worried-about-you smile.

“Ah, so that’s what it was…a headache,” Yoona murmured to herself, nodding. Her absentmindedness surprised her sometimes. She heard Taecyeon chuckle beside her, and she swore she heard him mumble “choding” under his breath.

The doctor gave her a side-long glance before continuing on, “And if the headache comes back later, take one of these with water every 6 hours. Yes? Yes.”

He hastily tossed a box of Panadol at Hyoyeon (he had a bad sense of aim since it almost hit Sooyoung, who was next to her eating that chicken from earlier) before clonking out of the room, grumbling something about respect. The mood instantly lightened, it was as if the doctor had a dark, rainy cloud following him around. The small room was filled with chatter, with many saying “Are you alright now?” or “You scared us all!” and “It’s good to know you’re okay.” Not very long later, the girls’ manager told everyone to shut up and get out.

Taecyeon, who was beside her the whole time, stood up, Yoona noticed for the first time how tall he was. A giant, she thought to herself. Taecyeon gave her a wide, toothy smile, which looked strange yet adorable (but she returned it anyways), before asking for her number. Yoona had hardly gotten her phone out before Taecyeon was whisked away by both her manager and her members, with Taeyeon shrieking words like “You can’t corrupt my baby just yet, Taecyeon! We know what you’re after!”

(And later on, Yoona asks Taeyeon how she got from the stage to the room and Taeyeon told her that Taecyeon carried her. Yoona fainted again.)

(drabble) material happiness

2010-07-10T00:54:00.002+13:00

Title: Material Happiness

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: PG

A/N: Honestly, I don't know. At all...LOL. Spur of the moment thing, I guess ? I've been reading a book that's about this popular girl who actually has a lot of serious things happening in her family, like an eating disorder, depression. Anyways.

Material Happiness

They say I'm pretty, and they say I'm

popular. But I guess they'll never

know that every day, I wake up

wishing that I hadn't. I don't want

to know what lies ahead for me.

I don't even know who I am anymore.

Misunderstood and underrated.

I'm not sure if my characteristics are

real or just something taxed off another

person. They say I live for the money,
the sex and the boys when really
I never should have lived,

and I'm sorry to the people who

could have but never did. Because in

this cruel world, in exchange for

a life is another life. I guess I never
deserved my shot at it. I'm tired
of all the lies. They say they are
my friends. But I know better than
that. They're only using me. And
when they're done, they'll throw me away.

Under all the make-up, the glamour and

the fame is something much darker. Uglier.

Everyone is more superior than me.

They all know it, but they'll never say it.

Because they think I'd get hurt.

What they don't understand is that I already am.

Put on a smile and wait.

I'll wait for the day when someone can

see through me. And maybe one day,

someone will finally ask;

"Are you okay?...I love you."

Until then.

Bottle it up and keep it next to my heart forever.

Everyone has a secret, and this is mine.

(lyrics) 4minute: huh (romanized)

2010-07-07T23:46:00.000+13:00

4minute - HuH

[romanized]

volume up

the moment you've all been waiting for

attention everybody in this corner

from the cube

haha show me

say humph (huh huh huh huh)

say humph (huh) say humph (huh)

nan nae mamdaero nae meotdaero hae

(huh huh huh huh)

[jiyoon]

naega TV-e naogo shipta hamyeon (wae wae?)

jomdeo yeppeojigo shipta hamyeon (wae wae?)

[gayoon]

modu da an dwindagoman malhae what you do

[jiyoon]

utgiji ma naneun nae mamdaero (uh huh, uh huh)

[jihyun]

nae saenggak bodan ([gayoon] nae saenggak bodan)

jakku gateun geol barae ([jiyoon] ttok gateun gotman barae)

[gayoon]

modu da naegeseo gateun moseubman barae please leave me

[hyuna]

baby you are kidding me, huh huh huh huh huh huh ha

[sohyun]

i wanna be on magazine modu mamdaero in my scene

chingaling chingaling chingaling hai

work it work it work it out

[gayoon]

ireon jeoreon maldeul da ijeo beoryeo

huh huh huh huh

da mateun ggum jiwobeoryeo

huh huh huh huh

[jiyoon]

say humph say humph

nae maedaero nae motdaero hae

[hyuna]

nuguboda naega naega i'm on the top

[gayoon]

igeot jeogeot jakku tto shikiji ma

huh huh huh huh

nal bakkuryeogo haji ma

huh huh huh huh

[jiyoon]

say humph say humph

nae maedaero nae motdaero hae

[hyuna]

nuguboda naega naega i'm on the top

[jiyoon]

naega jjalbeun chimareul ibeumyeon (no oh no oh)

moril jjalbge jareugo shipta hamyeon (no oh no oh)

[gayoon]

modu da isanghadago malhae what you do

[jiyoon] utgiji ma naneun naemamdaero (uh huh uh huh)

[jihyun]

nae moseub bodan ([gayoon] nae moseub bodan)

jakku dareun geol barae ([jiyoon] je meotdaerodeul malae)

[gayoon]

modu da maeundaero nareul bakkuryeo hae please leave me

[hyuna]

baby you are kidding me huh huh huh huh huh huh ha

[sohyun]

i am gonna be famous ije buteon dangdanghan ladies

chingaling chingaling chingaling hai

work it work it work it out

[gayoon]

ireon jeoreon maldeul da ijeo beoryeo

huh huh huh huh

da mateun ggum jiwobeoryeo

huh huh huh huh

[jiyoon]

say humph say humph

nae maedaero nae motdaero hae

[hyuna]

nuguboda naega naega i'm on the top

[hyuna]

yo, keep outta my way

you can't touch us
nal kkokkeuryeo hadaga neon dachyeo
real music euro mujanghan young ladies
sunjinhan pyojeongeun neol wi han my fake skill
oh oh byeolsseo sumeobeo lyeottni
kkok kkok sumeola meori karak boilla
ireon nam gamdanghal su ittgettni huh?
ajik boyeojulge sandeomi ya huh!

[gayoon]

ireon jeoreon maldeul da ijeo beoryeo

huh huh huh huh

da mateun ggum jiwobeoryeo

huh huh huh huh

[jiyoon]

say humph say humph

nae maedaero nae motdaero hae

[hyuna]

nuguboda naega naega i'm on the top

[gayoon]

igeot jeogeot jakku tto shikiji ma

huh huh huh huh

nal bakkuryeogo haji ma

huh huh huh huh

[jiyoon]

say humph say humph

nae maedaero nae motdaero hae

[hyuna]

nuguboda naega naega i'm on the top

CREDITS: romanization - me (jaelynnpark.blogspot.com)

please credit if using, please drop a comment if there's an error.

thank you :)

(lyrics) miss a: bad girl good girl (romanized + translated)

2010-07-06T23:27:00.002+13:00

Bad Girl Good Girl - miss A
[romanization]
haha jyp, introducing
made in asia
miss a

you don't know me
you don't know me
you don't know me
you don't know me
so shut up boy
so shut up boy
so shut up boy
so shut up shut up

apeseon
hanmadido mot deoni
dwieseoneun
nae yaekireul anjohke hae
eoriga eobseo

hello hello hello
na gateun yeojaneun
cheoeum-euro (euro euro)
bon geot gateuneunde wae
nareul pandanhani
naega hokshi
deulyoun geoni

geoteuroneun bad girl
sokeuroneun good girl
nareul jal aljido mothamyeonseo
nae geotmoseubman bomyeonseo
hanshimhan yeojaro boneun
neo-ui shiseoni
nan neomuna utgyeo

chumchul ddaeneun bad girl

sarangeun good girl

chumchuneun nae moseubeul bol ddaeneun

neokseul nohgo bogoseoneun

ggeutnani songalakjilhaneun

geu wiseoni

nan neomuna utgyeo

ireon ot
ireon meori moyangeuro
ireon chumeul chuneun
yeojaneun bbeonhae
nega deo bbeonhae

hello hello hello
jashin eobseumyeon
jeo dwiro (dwiro dwiro)
mulleoseomyeon dwiji
wae jakku ddeodeuni
ne sogi hwonhi
boineun geon ani

geoteuroneun bad girl

sokeuroneun good girl

nareul jal aljido mothamyeonseo

nae geotmoseubman bomyeonseo

hanshimhan yeojaro boneun

neo-ui shiseoni

nan neomuna utgyeo

chumchul ddaeneun bad girl
sarangeun good girl
chumchuneun nae moseubeul bol ddaeneun
neokseul nohgo bogoseoneun
ggeutnani songalakjilhaneun
geu wiseoni
nan neomuna utgyeo

(nal gamdang) hal su ittneun
namjareul chajayo
jinjja namjareul chajayo
(malroman)
namjadaun cheokhal namja malgo
(nal bulan) hae haji anheul
namjaneun ebsnayo
jashingami neomchyeoseo
naega nail su ittge
jayulobge dugo
malliseo baraboneun

geoteuroneun bad girl
sokeuroneun good girl
nareul jal aljido mothamyeonseo
nae geotmoeubman bomyeonseo
hanshimhan yeojao boneun
neoui shiseoni
nan neomuna utgyeo

chumchul ddaeneun bad girl

sarangeun good girl

chumchuneun nae moseubeul bol ddaeneun

neokseul nohgo bogoseoneun

ggeutnani songalakjilhaneun

geu wiseoni

nan neomuna utgyeo

you don't know me

so shut up boy

so shut up shut up

[translation]

you couldn't say a thing in front of me

but you could talk badly about me behind my back

i'm dumbfounded

hello hello hello

it seems like the first time, time, time

you've seen a girl like me

why do you judge me?

are you afraid of me, perhaps?

on the outside, i'm a bad girl

on the inside, i'm a good girl

you don't even know me well

you only look at me from the outside

i find your gaze to be funny

because you see me as a pitiful girl

when i dance, i'm a bad girl

when i love, i'm a good girl

when you watch me dance

you become mesmerized

but i find your hypocrisy to be funny

because you point at me after you're done watching

these kind of clothes, this kind of hair

a girl who does these kind of dances is obvious

you're even more obvious

hello hello hello

if you don't have any confidence

go to the back, back, back

you just need to step back

why do you keep making noise?

don't you know that your heart can clearly be seen?

on the outside, i'm a bad girl

on the inside, i'm a good girl

you don't even know me well

you only look at me from the outside

i find your gaze to be funny

because you see me as a pitiful girl

when i dance, i'm a bad girl

when i love, i'm a good girl

when you watch me dance

you become mesmerized

but i find your hypocrisy to be funny

because you point at me after you're done watching

i'm looking for a man who can handle me

i'm looking for a real man

not a man who acts like one through words

isn't there a man who won't make me anxious

because he overflows with confidence?

so that i can be me

so that i can watch him freely from afar?

on the outside, i'm a bad girl

on the inside, i'm a good girl

you don't even know me well

you only look at me from the outside

i find your gaze to be funny

because you see me as a pitiful girl

when i dance, i'm a bad girl

when i love, i'm a good girl

when you watch me dance

you become mesmerized

but i find your hypocrisy to be funny

because you point at me after you're done watching

you don't know me

so shut up boy

so shut up shut up

credits: romanization - me (jaelynnpark.blogspot.com)

translation - d0rkiamyxd @ youtube.com (she's an amazing singer!)
please credit if using, please leave a comment if here's an error.
thank you =D

(lyrics) f(x): nu ABO (romanized + translated)

2010-05-23T23:43:00.001+13:00

[luna] hey~

[amber] yo!

[kyrstal] na eoddeokhaeyo eonni ?

nae mareul deureobwa

nae geu sarameul eonni

moreugesseoyo

[luna] cham eongdunghada maen nal

naman nolliji ?

naega jeongmal yeppeo ?

geureohdaneunde

[sulli] dokchangjeon byeol myeong jitgi

yereul deulmyeon gungdi sundi

mame deuleo son beonjjeok deulgi

jeongmal nan NU ABO

[all] mystery mystery

molla molla ajik naneun molla

gibon gibon saranggongshik

saramdeului ibyeolgongshik

hysteric hysteric

dalla dalla naneun neomu dalla

nae mamdero nae dduttaero

joha joha NU ABO

[all] nananana nana na nanana

nananana na nananana

nananana nana na nanana nananana nan NUABO

[amber] nae mal deuleobwayo eonni

im in the trance

jigeu, i gamjeongeun mwojyo?

nan cheoeuminde

[victoria] gaseum dugeun dugeun machi

machi ggumgguneun dut

nan gureum wireul dungdung

sarangingabwa

[sulli]ddak se beon ssawoboki

he-eo jil ddae insa anhgi

bogo shipeun na saenggak deul ttaen

keopeulring manjyeo bogi

[all] mystery mystery

molla molla ajik naneun molla

gibon gibon saranggongshik

saramdeului ibyeolgongshik

hysteric hysteric

dalla dalla naneun neomu dalla

nae mamdero nae dduttaero

joha joha NU ABO

[all] nananana nana na nanana

nananana na nananana

nananana nana na nanana nananana nan NUABO

[krystal] sarange ppajin geon

neomu meotjin ilinde

namanui gamjeongeul

modu jugo baero banneun geot yeah

[luna] saeropge jom dwike

meotjin ggumeul kiwo ganeun geot

mystery ABO geugeon modu da naingeol

baro naran girl ooh~ whatchu whatchu call

whatchu whatchu whatchu call

[amber] yes this is how we do it our love f(x) yeah yeah

yeah this is how we do it pure love f(x) yeah yeah

yeah this is how we do it brand new love f(x)

[luna] ireon moseub eoddae?

ige nangeol eoddeokhae?

nae gyeote nega isseo taekbyeol han geon de yeah

oh~

[all] mystery mystery

molla molla ajik naneun molla

gibon gibon saranggongshik

saramdeului ibyeolgongshik

hysteric hysteric

dalla dalla naneun neomu dalla

nae mamdero nae dduttaero

joha joha NU ABO

[all] nananana nana na nanana

nananana na nananana

nananana nana na nanana

nananana na nananana [amber] yeah this is how we do it baby--

nananana nana na nanana nananana nan NUABO

Hey~

Yo!

Unni, what should I do?

Listen to what I'm saying.

Unni, I don't really understand people.

I'm always eccentric.

I'm always made fun of.

I'm really pretty.

If so, its okay.

A creative nickname chosen.

For example 'Goongdi Soondi'.

If you like it wave your hands.

I'm really a NU ABO!

Mystery, mystery. Don't know, don't know. You don't know yet.

Basics, basics. Love formula. Everyone's break up formula.

Hysteric, hysteric. Different, different. I'm too different.

My own will. My own preference. Like it, like it. NU ABO!

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, na na na na na

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, NU ABO

Unni, listen to what I say.

I'm in the trance.

What is this feeling?

This is the first time.

My heart is fluttering like crazy.

Like I'm in a dream.

I'm in the clouds boom boom.

This must be love.

Just argue 3 times.

No hugs in the break up.

When you miss me and think of me.

Look at the couple rings.

Mystery, mystery. Don't know, don't know. You don't know yet.

Basics, basics. Love formula. Everyone's break up formula.

Hysteric, hysteric. Different, different. I'm too different.

My own will. My own preference. Like it, like it. NU ABO!

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, na na na na na

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, NU ABO

It's amazing falling in love.

It's like having my own unforgettable feelings.

It's like taking care of my own dream by coming about freshly.

Mystery ABO, that's all yours. That's you ooh~

What you, What you call. What you, what you, what you call.

Yes, this is how we do it our love f(x)! Yeah! Yeah!

Yeah, this is how we do it pure love f(x)! Yeah! Yeah!

Yeah, this is how we do it baby, love f(x)! uh~

How does this look? This is me, so what to do?

You're considered special if you're next to me yeah~

Mystery, mystery. Don't know, don't know. You don't know yet.

Basics, basics. Love formula. Everyone's break up formula.

Hysteric, hysteric. Different, different. I'm too different.

My own will. My own preference. Like it, like it. NU ABO!

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, na na na na na

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, NU ABO

(Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, this is how we do it pure love f(x))

Na na, na na, na na, na na na, na na, na na, NU ABO

(Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, this is how we do it baby)

Credits:

Romanization - jaelynnpark.blogspot.com (me)

Translation - wondergeneration.blogspot.com
Requested by Bobo :)

(blog) huh huh huh huh

2010-05-22T18:38:00.000+13:00

Listening to: 4minute - HuH

I am:
Happy. Sad.A good friend. Adventurous. Shy. Confident. Procrastinating. A male. Bored. Anxious. Clumsy. Sociable. Always punctual. Selfish. Intelligent. Funny. A female. Sarcastic. Insecure. Sick. Beautiful. Articulate. Loud. Kind. Even tempered. Honest. Short. Tall. Medium height. Proud of myself.Loving. Witty. Down to earth. Outspoken. Determined. High-maintenance. Pretty. Assertive. Organized. Selfless.

I have:
Brown hair. Brown Eyes. Blue Eyes. Curly hair. Long fingernails. Braces. Chipped nail polish. Long legs BAHAHA. Straight hair. A fringe. Long eyelashes. Sore feet. Freckles. Dark skin. Medium skin. Green eyes. Blonde hair. Dyed hair. Short legs. Red hair. Big Boobs. (LMFAO) Rosy cheeks. Wavy hair. Black hair. Small-ish waist. Tattoos. Piercings. Big ears. Short hair.

I love:
Flowers. Kisses. Summer. Coffee. The rain. Candles. Incense. Late night talk shows. Insects. Hugs. Attention. The beach. Chocolate. Music. Beanies. Harry Potter. Twilight. Facebook. Black and white photos. Sleeping in. Driving. Narrating my pet's thoughts. Opening gifts. Buying gifts. Halloween. Cute texts. Apples. Compliments. Country music. Hip hop. Sushi. Sports. Art. Singing. Seeing my loved ones happy. Surprises. Sunsets and sunrises. Skinny dipping. Horror movies. Simon Cowell. Family Guy. Garlic. Hearing somebody talk in their sleep. Being right. KFC. Abstract photography. Concerts and festivals. Tanning. Oversized t-shirts <33.

I would love to be a:
Police officer. Lawyer. Doctor. Teacher. Fruit picker. Mother. Greenpeace volunteer. Hippie. Groupie. Rockstar. Footballer's wife. Therapist. Singer. Actress. Diving instructor. Lottery winner. Company owner. Housewife. Nurse. Builder. Race car driver. Website developer. An inspirational talker. Music teacher. Artist. Chef. Makeup artist. Hairdresser. Restaurant owner. Homeless shelter volunteer.Fitness trainer. Vet. Radio show host. Band manager.

I like to eat:
Fruit. Vegetables. Fast food. Sushi. In bed. Rice. Sandwiches. Subway. Chicken. Cakes. Seafood. A lot. Pasta. Rice crackers. When I'm bored. Cheese. Ice cream. Garlic bread. Peanut butter out of the jar.Eggs. Lots of ethnic foods. Pancakes. Honey. Lunch. Bread crusts. Low calorie foods. Soy products. Gluten free products. Only when I'm hungry. Toast. Breakfast. Pizza.

I dislike:
Cold mornings. Baths. People dissing my taste in music. People in front of me walking really slowly. Having my personal space invaded. Cleaning. Going to bed early. Wine/beer. Religion arguments.Coffee. The beach. Rain. Children. Having my photo taken. Drama. Gossiping. Hip hop. Cooking shows.Drugs. Cats. People singing happy birthday to me. Selfish people. Social networking sites. Swimming. Snow. Eminem. Seafood. One word text messages. Awkward silences. Alarm clocks. Hypocrisy.

(drabble) what is true love?

2010-05-16T23:46:00.002+13:00

Title: What Is True Love?
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: PG
A/N: Nothing in particular. Its just shit written out on a page. I was thinking of Jessica while I wrote this...she kind of seems like that sort of person.
Do not read if you believe in true love.
I don't want anyone hating on me.

What Is True Love?
True love is meant to be perfect. It's meant to be the best feeling in the world. Who ever said that might as well shoot themselves because true love is anything but.

To get something good, you must suffer the through hardships first. Love will make you feel happy, ecstatic even, and high. But love can also make you feel hated, rejected and hurt. And you'll never even know until it comes back and spits in your face.

If there ever was such thing as true love, then why does it hurt so much? Why is it that The One is so hard to find? Why do they call it heartbreak when it feels like every part of your body is about to fall apart?

They say that if you truly love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, then you'll have it forever. If it doesn't then it just was never meant to be.

Because in the end, you'll look back and think "Dammit, I was a shithead for ever believing in it in the first place."

(announcement) #78 - CBOXXXXX !

2010-04-14T00:54:00.003+13:00

HELLO MY BABIES READERS!
Man I gotta stop doing that.
Anyways, I have installed a c-box ! It's sort like an msn thing.
PLEASE FILL IT UP WITH MANY TAGS AND MESSAGES~~
NO BASHING/TROLLING/NAGGING T____T"
AND I'M SORRRRYYYYY I HAVEN'T POSTED ANYTHING READABLE LATELY x__x
I have no inspiration.. /sigh.

-cries in a corner-

On the other hand, you can find it somewhere below my navigation system thing. Its not hard to miss :L

And I've also changed my hit counter bar because my old one was being stupid.

Also, I've removed the music because its sudden and annoying and I'm capped LOL.

Eheh. I keep coming back here to add stuff ^___^

(lyrics) girls' generation/snsd: run devil run (romanized + translated)

2010-04-13T14:46:00.000+13:00

[jessica] ddokbaro hae neon jeongmal bad boy
sarangbodan hogishippun
[yuri] geu dongan nan neo ddaeme ggamppak
sogaseo neomeogangeoya
[yoona] neon jaemieobseo maeneo eobseo
neon devil devil neon neon

[taeyeon] ne haedeupon sumanheun namjan
han geuljaman bakkun yeoja
[tiffany] nae kokkaji yeogkyeoun perfume
nugu geonji seolmyeonghaebwa
[sooyoung] neon na mollae nugeul mannaneun geumjjikhan geo beorut mot gochyeottni
[hyoyeon] ddwieo bwado sunbadak aningeol

[all] you better run run run run run
[sunny] deonenun mot bwa geodeocha jullae
[all] you better run run run run run
[seohyun] nal butjabado gwanshim ggeodullae hey
[taeyeon] deo meotjin naega dwineun nal
gapajugesseo itji ma
[all] you better run run run run run

[hyoyeon] ddak geollyeoyeoseo yagollyeosseo
run devil devil run run

[seohyun] nae gyeoteseo salmyeoshi heulgit
dareun yeojael ggok hulteobwa
[tiffany] nan obseul ddaen neon super playboy
gogae deuro daedapaebwa
[yuri] neon jaemieobseo maeneo eobseo

neon devil devil neon neon

[all] you better run run run run run
[yoona] deonenun mot bwa geodeocha jullae
[all] you better run run run run run
[sunny] nal butjabado gwanshim ggeodullae hey
[jessica] deo meotjin naega dwineun nal
gapajugesseo itji ma
[all] you better run run run run run

[tiffany] ddak geollyeoyeoseo yagollyeosseo

run devil devil run run

[taeyeon] neon jaemieobseo maeneo eobseo

run devil devil run run

[sunny] yae na gateun ae eodido eobseo
[hyoyeon] janmeori gullyeoseo shilmanghaesseo
[sunny] nan gyenedeul boda deo daedanhae
[hyoyeon] neo geureohke keoseo mwo dwellae
[taeyeon] ggabulji mallaettji
[sooyoung] neol saranghae jul ddae jal haretji

[all] you better run run run run run
[yuri] deonenun mot bwa geodeocha jullae
[all] you better run run run run run
[sooyoung] nal butjabado gwanshim ggeodullae hey
[seohyun] deo meotjin naega dwineun nal
gapajugesseo itji ma
[all] you better run run run run run

[jessica] e neolbeun sesang baneun namja
neo hana bbajyeo bwattja
[taeyeon] ggok naman bwajul meotjin namja
nan gidarillae honja

~~

Behave. You're too much of a bad boy.
You're too curious.
I was cheated on at that time,
all because of you.

No fun, no manners.
You, devil, devil, you, you.

You changed one letter (one letter)
of all the girls' names
in your cellphone.

I can smell the abundance of perfume on you.
Explain to me, (explain to me), who's it is.

(Hey) That habit, of you meeting girls
without me knowing, still didn't go away?
Even if you run, it's obvious.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
I won't give in, I'll just kick you.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
Even if you beg me not to leave, I don't care anymore.

(Hey) I'll come back even better
and i'll get revenge. Don't forget it.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
You're caught, and i'm angry.
Run, devil, devil, run, run.

Even next to me,
you're with another girl.
When i'm not here, (not here)
you're a super playboy.
Raise your chin, and respond to me. (respond to me)

No fun, no manners.
You, devil, devil, you, you.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
I won't give in, I'll just kick you.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
Even if you beg me not to leave, I don't care anymore.

(Hey) I'll come back even better
and i'll get revenge. Don't forget it.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
You're caught, and i'm angry.
Run, devil, devil, run, run.

No fun, no manners.
Run, devil, devil, run, run.

There's no one else like me, anywhere.
You made a mistake.
I'm so much better than all of those other girls.
What do you want to do with all that? Do you think you're that great?
Didn't I tell you not to play around?
Didn't I tell you to be good to me until I stopped loving you?

You better run, run, run, run, run.
I won't give in, I'll just kick you.

You better run, run, run, run, run.
Even if you beg me not to leave, I don't care anymore.

(Hey) I'll come back even better
and i'll get revenge. Don't forget it.

You better run, run, run, run, run. (you better run, run, run)
There's so many guys in this world,
so it doesn't matter if you're not there.
Until the day I find a boy that only cares for me,
I'll wait by myself.

CREDITS: romanization - me (x3jae)
translation - monster lyrics

(blog) im lonely, im lonely, im lonely, ajikdo

2010-04-11T22:25:00.000+13:00

Listening to: KARA - Lonely

Oh my goshhhhhhh~~

I just finished watching the drama God of Study, starring Kim Suro, Yoo Seungho and T-ara's Jiyeon, and of course other actors as well but you know. It had a pretty shit ending, like seriously. = =

Reminds me of how Boys Over Flowers had a shit ending as well.

But anyways, I'M SO PISSED, LIKE FUCK. I STILL HAVE MANY ASSIGNMENTS TO DO AND MY PARENTS ARE MAKING ME DO TEXTBOOK WORK, AISHH.

Moving on, happy easter to you all! (Sorry about the slow updates, I'm lacking inspiration T_T) Until next my babies readers :)

(drabble) as much as the stars

2010-04-02T21:59:00.002+13:00

Title: As Much As The Stars

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: G

A/N: Inspired by Girls' Generation's Star Star Star. It's kinda Yoona centric.

As Much As The Stars

As I look up at the sky tonight, I think of you. The many memories we shared together, flood my heart, suffocating it.

“Hey, oppa,” I asked, snuggling up closer to you. We were sitting together on the rooftop of my apartment, gazing up at the night sky.

“Hmm?” you murmured, not looking at me.

“…How much do you love me?” I whisper, only loud enough to hear. You chuckled slightly, and continued to stare up at the night sky, the stars shining brightly above us. They rarely showed themselves to us, tonight, we were lucky.

“Tell me, how many stars are there in the sky?” you ask, turning towards me, brushing a few strands of hair out of my face.

I laugh. “Don’t change the subject.”

“Just tell me.”

“Well, I don’t know, there are countless amounts of stars. No one could ever know exactly how many…”

“Then that’s how much I love you.”

I smile as I remember. Silent tears roll down my cheeks.

You told me that you loved me. I thought that our love would last for as long the stars would shine.

별별별, 별만큼 사랑해...

(drabble) game over

2010-03-20T18:33:00.001+13:00

Title: Game Over
Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)
Rating: PG-13?
A/N: My first murder/crime/dark kind of story? Not sure. You might see it again somewhere... in the future... ;D No hints now. Written in present tense, 2nd person. I'm not telling you the gender of the person, you can work that out yourself. (Y) When you, uh, see the future thing, it will be less crappy. I promise!

Game Over
It's black, you can't see anything. You're choking on a dirty rag that tastes like foul sewerage. Your hands are tied back behind your back, your ankles are messily strapped to the legs of the wooden chair on which you sit.

Being blind is dangerous. Being knocked unconscious and then waking up to blind is even more dangerous, for you can't even remember where you were before being jumped on, nor can you remember the time or how long you've been awake, waiting.

You try to shift around, to get in a more comfortable position until you hear a click, like a magazine of a gun turning into place, and then something prods you in the side of your head.

"Don't move."

You grunt slightly, to acknowledge the command and the gun is withdrawn. Suddenly, the blindfold is ripped from your head, startling your eyes. They didn't have to adjust much since the room, which appeared to be a basement, was dimly light anyways. The gag is also removed, and you spit onto the floor to your right, ridding your mouth of the ghastly taste.

"What do you want from me?" you whisper, your eyes not leaving the floor.

"Yes...what do we want from you?" a rough voice replied. You look up to see a woman slouching in a chair in front of you, twirling her gun carelessly before catching it again. No one says anything. You notice that there are other people in the basement, all bigger and stronger than you, killing all chances of escape.

"Give her to us," the woman says finally, sitting up, and leaning forward while resting her elbow on her knee. You eye the shiny pistol cautiously.

"I don't know what you're talking about," you answer simply. The woman makes a disgusted sound before standing up and walking closer to you. When she's close enough she strikes you sharply across the face. But you didn't see the streak of silver, but you felt it. You felt it as it was plunged into your stomach. The woman smirked, dropping the dagger onto the floor in front of you, watching you gasp for air. It was like your soul was leaking out. Killing you slowly.

The last thing you heard before slipping into eternal darkness sent horrid chills down your spine.

"Game over."

(blog) takes one to know one, dont tell me theres no one

2010-03-12T23:21:00.001+13:00

Listening to: Drew Scott Ryan - Takes One to Know One

I know, I know. It's been a while since I've posted anything. AT ALL. Since 13th of February, actually. But you know, I've changed some things! Like the title thingo of this blog. It's still called "___幻想HEART;" but now the top bar thing just says "im dancing this dance alone;"

I've also changed the music, from Love Like This to Star Star Star to Takes One To Know One.

No worries. I really do hope that something will be posted soon... after I finish my english speech. And maybe my geography report.

By the bye, gotta love Kara's new concept; Stealer. Keke. I can't wait to see Black Soshi!~

Until then, annyeong.

(lyrics) girls' generation/snsd: star star star - ☆★☆ - 별별별 (romanized + translated)

2010-02-13T15:12:00.001+13:00

[yoona] hana...dul...set...tto...
hana...dul...set...
michigetda, byeol deura

[taeyeon] amuri cheodabwado
nega boijireul anha, oh baby
du nune gadeuk goin nun mul ddaemune
da neo ddaemune
[jessica] beonjyeojin geulja wiro bichin
uneun da eolgul, oh baby
ddo eulji mallago nal dajimhae bwado
ddo uleo

[sooyoung] na eoddeoke ([sunny] molla eoddeoke, eoddeoke)
na ireoke (molla michige ireoke)
da neo ddaemune (jeongmal neo ddaemune)
na amugeotdo hal su eobs-janha

[tiffany] nan nal byeol byeol byeol byeomankeum saranghae
wattdeon geoya neoreul chaja, jeo molliseo
neon shining star
[sunny] byeol byeol byeol byeolmaleul da hae bwado
pyohyeoni an dwae jeongmal
neomuna dab dabhae, ijena eoddeke haeya hana

[seohyun] hana dul se-eo bwado
kkgeuti boijireul anha, oh baby
gaseume gadeuk damgin chueok ddaemune
ddo ne saenggake
[tiffany]mot dahan yaegireul kkeonae
honjatmalppeun irado, oh baby
neol dolryeo dalrago, nal bonae dalrago
ne gyeote

[hyoyeon] kkok bubutkhae ([sunny] jebal ireoke butakhae)
kkok haneule (naui gidoreul haneule)
nal wironhae (nareul wirohae jukdaneun)
nan eodie ittni jebal

[yuri] byeol byeol byeol byeoldeura malhae bwa
kkeutnan geoni, geureon geoni
daedabhae bwa, utjiman malgo
[taeyeon] byeol byeol byeol byeoldeura butaekhae
dan han beonmanirado nal
nae sarang ne gyeote, nalagal su ittge hae jwo

[seohyun] star star star
[taeyeon] oh baby, star star star... oh~

[seohyun] nan nal byeol byeol byeol byeomankeum saranghae

wattdeon geoya neoreul chaja, jeo molliseo

neon shining star

[jessica] byeol byeol byeol byeolmaleul da hae bwado

pyohyeoni an dwae jeongmal

neomuna dab dabhae, ijena eoddeke haeya hana

TRANSLATION
one...two...three...again
one...two...three...
stars, i'm going crazy

no matter how many times i look at you
i can't see you, oh baby
because of the tears in my eyes
all because of you
my crying face that is reflecting
above the spreaded letters, oh baby
i promised myself i wouldn't cry again
but i'm crying again

what do i do? (i don't know what to do, what to do)
this is me (i don't know, going crazy like this)
all because of you (really, because of you)
i can't do anything

i love you as much as the stars, stars, stars, stars
i came for you, to find you
you're that far shining star
stars, stars, stars, no matter what i say
i really can't express myself
i'm fustrated now, what should i do now?

no matter how many times i count
i can't see the end, oh baby
because of all the memories that are in my heart
i think of you again
i couldn't say everything i wanted to
so i say them to myself, oh baby
i want you back, i want to go back to your side

i'm pleading to you (please, i'm pleading to you)
to the sky (my prayer goes to the sky)
cheer me up (cheer me up)
please, where are you now?

stars, stars, stars, stars, talk to me
is it over? is that it?
answers me, don't just be laughing
stars, stars, stars, stars, i'm pleading to you
just for once, my love
let me fly to your side

star star star, oh baby, star, star, star

i love you as much as the stars, stars, stars, stars
i came for you, to find you
you're that far shining star
stars, stars, stars, stars, no matter what i say
i really can't express myself
i'm fustrated now, what should i do now?

CREDITS: romanization - meee (x3jae)
translation - kkbluvv @ soshified

(drabble) how did i fall in love with you

2010-02-09T22:26:00.000+13:00

Title: How Did I Fall In Love With You

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: PG?

Notes: It seems to me that I'm writing everything but my updates, LOL Dx Inspired by Back Street Boys' song, How Did I Fall In Love With You, so you might see lines of that song in here. My first time writing in a guy's perspective. Slight crack. Pretty shit.

How Did I Fall In Love With You

I fell too hard, too fast, again. Although I like her so much, I don't want to hurt her, I can't help it. Shaking off the thoughts that it might be "natural" or that she might be "the one", I remember how my friends go on and on about how every girl I fell for was never the right one, and now, they say the same thing about her. But I feel like this is different.

"Haha, right. I bet your heart goes dugeun dugeun, aye?" they tease. I close my eyes and shake my head, sighing.

We were tight, close like best friends, like brother and sister. I don't know what happened, was it something that she said? Something she did? What happened to make this happen?

"Speak of her and she will appear!" they say as they crowd around her. I bury myself in my thoughts, why? I can feel her eyes on me and before I knew it...

"Hey oppa, what's up?" she says quietly, taking the seat next to me.

"Nothing much... you?" I love you.

"Me too, I'm so tired these days... I've been getting dark eye circles."

"You should sleep earlier then." So, so much.

"But then I won't be able to talk to you late at night!"

"Haha, but you should sleep." I don't know why or how.

"...Whatever." She laughed a light, musical laugh.

How did I fall in love with you... ♥

(lyrics) girls' generation/snsd: oh! (romanized)

2010-02-06T16:07:00.000+13:00

[all] jeone aldeon naega anya brand new sound

saero wojin naui hamkke one more round

dance dance dance till we run this town

oppa oppa i'll be i'll be down down down down

[seohyun] hey oppa najombwa, nalreul jom barabwa
[tiffany] cheoeumiya ireon nae maltu ha!
[yuri] meorido hago hwajangdo haettneunde
[jessica] wae neomeon neoman moreuni
[taeyeon] dugeun dugeun gaseumi ddeolyeo wayo
jakku jakku sangsangman haneungeolyo
[sooyoung] eoddeoke hana, kotdae napdeon naega
[yoona] malhago shipeo

[all] oh oh oh oh
oppareul saranghae
ah ah ah ah
manhi manhi hae
[sunny] sujubeuni jebal utji mayo
[taeyeon] jinshimini nolrijido malayo
[all] ddo babo gateun mal bbuniya

[all] jeone aldeon naega anya brand new sound
saero wojin naui hamkke one more round
dance dance dance till we run this town
oppa oppa i'll be i'll be down down down down

[jessica] oppa jamkkanman jamkkanman deuleobwa
[sunny] jakku ddan yaegineun malgo
[sooyoung] dongsaengeuroman saenggakhajin mala
[hyoyeon] il-nyeon dwimyeon huhoehalgeol
[tiffany] molla molla nae mameul jeonhyeon molla
nunchi eobsge jangnanman chineungeolyo
[hyoyeon] eoddeoke hana i cheoleobsneun sarama
[seohyun] deoleobwa jeongmal

[all] oh oh oh oh

oppareul saranghae

ah ah ah ah

manhi manhi hae

[yuri] sujubeuni jebal utji mayo

[yoona] jinshimini nolrijido malayo

[all] ddo geureomyeon na uljido molla

[all] jeone aldeon naega anya brand new sound

mwonga dareun oneulmaneun ddeugeoun maeum

daeumdaeum miroji ma hwaman na

oppa oppa idaeroneun no no no no

[jessica] tell me boy boy, love it?

it it it it it it ah!

[all] oh oh oh oh

oppareul saranghae

ah ah ah ah

manhi manhi hae

oh oh oh oh oh oh

oppareul saranghae

ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

manhi manhi hae

ddo babo gateun mal bbunya

oh oh oh oh

ah ah ah ah

oh oh oh oh oh oh

oppareul saranghae

ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

manhi manhi hae

oh oh oh oh

oppareul saranghae

ah ah ah ah

manhi manhi oh!

CREDITS: romanization - meee (x3jae)

(lyrics) girls' generation/snsd: show! show! show! (romanized live vers.)

2010-02-06T15:38:00.001+13:00

[all] show me show me
show me show me
show me show me
hurry hurry

[jessica] banjjak banjjak oh dugeun dugeun
hana hana da mamedeuleo
[sunny] hannune seuk jina chyeo bwa do
neo hanaman jjok nae seutailingeol
[hyoyeon&yuri] hush hush hush
naui maeumeul boyeojwo

[tiffany] listen to me

[all] show me show me
[yoona] aiko keuniliya
[all] show me show me
[seohyun] ijen nayadannasseo
[all] show me show me
[sooyoung] jakku bogo shipeunde
[all] hurry hurry
[taeyeon] ajikdo moleugettni

[taeyeon] uh uh ireon jeongmal daedanhae
ajjilhage nege ppajyeodeuleo
[seohyun] subaenman beon gominhaebwado
[tiffany] nae shimjangeun automatic-in geol
[sooyoung&yoona] hush hush hush
naui maeumeul bo yajwo

[tiffany] listen to me

[all] show me show me

[yoona] aiko keuniliya

[all] show me show me

[seohyun] ijen nayadannasseo

[all] show me show me

[yuri] jakku bogo shipeunde

[all] hurry hurry

[hyoyeon] dagawa soksagyeojwo

[taeyeon] show me show me yeah, show me baby

[jessica] sumgiryeo haji malyo

[taeyeon] eoddeoke hanayo

nal heundeulji malajwoyo ooh~ yeah

[jessica] if you wanna be my boy

[tiffany] i'm gonna be with you forever and more

[jessica] just tell that you love me i'll be there, right?

[jessica&tiffany] alright, just for you

[all] show me show me

[yoona] aiko keuniliya

[all] show me show me

[seohyun] ijen nayadannasseo

[all] show me show me

[sooyoung] jakku bogo shipeunde

[all] hurry hurry

[taeyeon] ajikdo moleugettni

[all] show me show me

[tiffany] cos i'm ready for you

[all] show me show me

[sunny] nado algo ittjana

[all] show me show me

[yuri] ijen mameul boyeojwo

[all] hurry hurry

[hyoyeon] dagawa soksakyeojwo

CREDITS: romanization - meeee (x3jae)

(drabble) the perfect child

2010-02-01T22:36:00.000+13:00

Title: The Perfect Child

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: G

The Perfect Child

I'm sorry that I'm not smart.

I'm sorry that I didn't make it into a higher school.

I'm sorry I couldn't do better.

I'm sorry that I wasn't good enough for you to believe in me.

I'm sorry that I wasted your time.

I'm sorry that I was a disappointment to everyone around me.

I'm sorry I can't be like my cousins.

I'm sorry that I couldn't do anything for shit.

I'm sorry for being a burden and a failure.

I'm sorry that I'm getting uglier instead of prettier like everyone else.

I'm sorry for being so 'heartless' that I didn't even see the pain that you were going through.

I'm sorry for being selfish, and yet so selfless.

I'm sorry for being me, for even existing.

I'm sorry for not turning out the way you wanted me to be.

I'm sorry that I wasn't the perfect child.

I'm sorry but, why did you even give birth to me?

(announcement) #66: school!

2010-01-31T00:28:00.002+13:00

School is back.

Tutor is back.

That means.

Slow updates.

Sorry.

From Jae x

(oneshot) mischievous - NC17

2010-01-28T22:32:00.003+13:00

Title: Mischievous

Author: Jaelyn Park (x3jae)

Rating: NC17

Genre: yaoi (boy x boy) + AU

Warning: crappy pre-smut. Don’t like it, don’t read it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Pairing: Minho/Taemin

Notes: Set in a castle. Minho is Taemin’s master.

Mischievous

Minho was doing his daily circling of the castle. Nodding at the passing ladies in waiting, who swooned and fanned themselves in his charismatic charm, he set off looking for Taemin.

“Damn it, where is he?” mumbled Minho as he paced down endless corridors, searching for his beloved. He hadn’t seen him all day, and every man has their needs…

Taking Minho off guard, his stomach grumbled. Ignoring it, he continued looking behind various doors until his stomach protested again. Minho sighed in defeat and started off in the direction of the kitchen.

As he came closer and closer to the kitchen, yells and crashing became more audible. Minho’s steps became quicker as he approached the kitchen and pulled open the door.

“Taemin?” he said. It would have been a sight for sore eyes if it weren’t for the fact that Taemin was struggling in the grasp of two guards and an angry looking cook.

“Minho, master!” chirped Taemin from in between the two guards.

“Ah, Minho!” said the cook, spinning around.

“What happened here?” asked Minho, slowly walking around the kitchen. He saw containers of flour spilt, pots and pans in the wrong place and lots of cutlery spread out everywhere.

“Taemin here,” the cook said, pointing harshly at the boy, “Was caught in the Royal pantry searching for chocolate!”

“Hey, I saw a rat!” protested Taemin but after receiving a furious glare from one of the guards, he fell quiet. Tebryn stared long and hard at Nismet, and the brown haired boy stared back with pleading eyes. It was like he was saying “HELP”.

“Yeah right you saw a rat!” yelled the cook, causing Taemin to lean back slightly, “You were trying to get your grubby little hands on the food!”

And as if someone had slapped him in the face, a great idea hit Minho.

“It’s okay,” Minho stated loudly and everyone looked at him curiously, “I’ll take care of Taemin.”

“Damn right, you will! He is your property and I expect you to deal with him properly!” scolded the cook, pushing Taemin roughly over to his master. Minho slightly bowed towards the pudgy man before leaving with a firm grip around Taemin’s shoulders.

Minho took Taemin back through the stony corridors until they stopped in front of Minho’s chamber door.

“Minho~ Thank you for saving me,” the young boy chirped, reaching up to hug his lover, who gladly held the boy. Their moment was interrupted by Minho’s stomach.

“Oh? You’re hungry?” asked Taemin, looking at him with wide eyes, “Let me go and get you something to—“

As Taemin was turning around to head back down into the kitchens (which was a stupid thing to do since he just got kicked out of there) to retrieve some food, Minho’s strong arms stopped him, pulling him close to his broad chest.

“No, its okay,” he whispered into Taemin’s ear, “All I want to eat is you.”

And without any other words, Minho hitched Taemin onto his shoulder and entered the chamber and slamming the door behind him.

Once inside, Minho dropped Taemin roughly onto the bed before pinning him down. He leaned down so that his teeth lightly grazed Taemin’s ear.

“You’ve been a bad boy…” he hissed before crashing their lips together. In amidst to fierce battle between tongues, Minho pulled out some leather straps from somewhere and tied the boy’s hands the bed post. Immediately, Taemin knew what was going to happen next.

“Punish me,” he said with lust filled eyes. There was something about Nismet that had always intrigued Minho; was it the sparkling brown eyes? Or was it his shiny silken hair? He would never know.

Minho’s lips moved painfully slowly down the side of the younger one’s face and started to suck on his neck, leaving red marks. Low groans began to emit from Taemin’s mouth which sent Minho’s blood rushing down to his crotch.

When Taemin felt something poking at his thighs, he immediately turned red in the face. Even though it probably wasn’t possible, Taemin turned even redder when Minho began to kiss him again, with more passion, while snaking a hand under his shirt. He began to trace light circles on the pale skin, their lips never disconnecting.

Taemin felt his pants tightening and he thought that Minho felt something too when he felt a smirk against his lips.

In the kitchen—

“Dear lord!” cried the cook, “Look at this mess!”

He gestured around the kitchen, the disastrous state Taemin had left the kitchen in.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” roared the cook as he spotted the two guards stuffing their faces with the freshly baked pies. They froze for a second before slowly setting their pies down and brushing themselves off.

“GO AND GET TAEMIN, BRING HIM HERE!” the cook shouted. The guards were pretty sure that the whole castle heard him yelling as they scurried off to Tebryn’s chamber.

When they reached the door, the first guard was ready to knock on the door until he heard loud groaning and moans that sounded vaguely like “Minho” and “Taemin”.

“Sounds like they’re busy…” said the second guard, pressing his ear against the door.

“Should we tell the cook?”

“…No, he’ll pound us.”

“Then what do we do?”

“Run for it.”

The guards exchanged glances and clattered down the corridor.

“WHAT’S TAKING YOU HOOLIGANS SO LONG?”

Comments are love :) Feedback is appreciated.

(announcement) #64: READ! - comments & the 5 stages of heartbreak

2010-01-28T17:31:00.003+13:00

Hey yo, Jae here! I know its only been a few days since the last announcement but this is important.

First of all, the comments link. When you first open this page, you can see all the posts, right? And at the footer of every post was something like "4 COMMENTS" or something. And you'd usually click on that if you wanted to post a comment from the home page. But now, you'd see "HEARTS", just click on that and it will take you to the place where you can post comments.

Secondly, about the story The 5 Stages of Heartbreak. I was thinking for a long time how to end it since it could have two different endings, depending on your preference. So, I've decided to do both. It might take a bit longer than the regular chapter, then think about it. You'll be getting two chapters :D It's like alternate endings, with no official ending. It makes me seem like a bad writer >___< Can't even decide what's going to happen in my own story. And I might throw in an Epilogue.

And if you haven't already noticed, I changed my layout. Again.

Don't forget, if you have any questions, please post them (here) at my Formspring.